To no malice will Kate not resort
Nor wording of canon contort
This arrogant witch
Made the bishops her bitch
And their meeting a kangaroo court
Showing posts with label limericks or poems. Show all posts
Showing posts with label limericks or poems. Show all posts
Friday, April 4, 2008
The Principal Bozo
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
April fool's joke (I wish)
The message she saw fit to impart
Was bereft of the faith from the start
For this Easter week
She saw worthy to speak
Of the threat to the earth when cows fart
Was bereft of the faith from the start
For this Easter week
She saw worthy to speak
Of the threat to the earth when cows fart
Monday, March 31, 2008
Kubla Kate
In San Joaquin did Kubla Kate
Her sovereign diocese decree:
Where Lamb, her stooge, did navigate
Through canons meaningless to state
- Down to a Sonless See.
No legal rules can thus withstand
Their will and lawyers they have at hand.
And there were graying men with modern views
Perfumed by many an incense-bearing priest.
And here was jargon wooden as the pews
Spoken but saying nothing in the least.
- But see ! their hearts' desire by what is treasured
- Through plans they make with pseudo-canon cover:
- A power play ! unholy and unmeasured
- Like an addict's raving 'till at last he's pleasured
- This mitered matron serves her demon-lover!
- And from this Schism, with ceaseless propaganda,
- To say this anal hamster were a panda,
- A thinly veiled and pointed threat was sent
- To dioceses that still will not repent
- Of stubborn clinging to the ancient ways,
- Rejecting all the godly gifts of gays.
- That orthodoxy shall not be permitted
- That to exclusive Truth is still committed.
- “We'll deal with them before they try to leave.
- Ere they try to change their constitution
- They'll be stopped by this final solution.
- For we'll not back down on what we believe.”
- And midst her triumph Kubla Kate dismissed
- The protests of some fools who did insist
- To be the San Joaquin SC.
- That they resigned, they denied.
- To all their claimed authority
- “That's been settled”, she replied.
It was a ruthless scheme of rare device!
Her faithless diocese was oh so N.I.C.E. !
- Apostate with a rainbow cap
- On her head that looked like crap,
- In Zion did she take a stroll
- Pretending she could fill the role
- Of a catholic order.
- Her Easter points imparting
- A warning for the earth
- Of dangers when cows are farting.
That's what her gospel is worth.
We must flee her lawless way
That knows no rule save power alone,
Where all her cronies shout and say,
“You cannot leave. Obey! Obey!”
This is no church in which to stay.
Desolation's on the throne.
And Sin's embraced and flesh adored.
They are not brethren in the Lord
Who think no Sin must be atoned.
Her sovereign diocese decree:
Where Lamb, her stooge, did navigate
Through canons meaningless to state
- Down to a Sonless See.
No legal rules can thus withstand
Their will and lawyers they have at hand.
And there were graying men with modern views
Perfumed by many an incense-bearing priest.
And here was jargon wooden as the pews
Spoken but saying nothing in the least.
- But see ! their hearts' desire by what is treasured
- Through plans they make with pseudo-canon cover:
- A power play ! unholy and unmeasured
- Like an addict's raving 'till at last he's pleasured
- This mitered matron serves her demon-lover!
- And from this Schism, with ceaseless propaganda,
- To say this anal hamster were a panda,
- A thinly veiled and pointed threat was sent
- To dioceses that still will not repent
- Of stubborn clinging to the ancient ways,
- Rejecting all the godly gifts of gays.
- That orthodoxy shall not be permitted
- That to exclusive Truth is still committed.
- “We'll deal with them before they try to leave.
- Ere they try to change their constitution
- They'll be stopped by this final solution.
- For we'll not back down on what we believe.”
- And midst her triumph Kubla Kate dismissed
- The protests of some fools who did insist
- To be the San Joaquin SC.
- That they resigned, they denied.
- To all their claimed authority
- “That's been settled”, she replied.
It was a ruthless scheme of rare device!
Her faithless diocese was oh so N.I.C.E. !
- Apostate with a rainbow cap
- On her head that looked like crap,
- In Zion did she take a stroll
- Pretending she could fill the role
- Of a catholic order.
- Her Easter points imparting
- A warning for the earth
- Of dangers when cows are farting.
That's what her gospel is worth.
We must flee her lawless way
That knows no rule save power alone,
Where all her cronies shout and say,
“You cannot leave. Obey! Obey!”
This is no church in which to stay.
Desolation's on the throne.
And Sin's embraced and flesh adored.
They are not brethren in the Lord
Who think no Sin must be atoned.
Pax vobiscum, or else
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Ozymandias' church
I met a Christian of the ancient creed
He said: A church once sound and orthodox
Stands in the city, decked with dust and weed,
Its windows dark and doors fixed with padlocks
And placard whose authority decreed
That parishes can never TEC depart,
And 'piscopal this church will always stay.
The narrow minds must chose to walk apart,
For those who stay must pay obedience due.
This Church will always make its point to say
To all of reasoned faith “We Welcome You”.
And silence reigned inside as in a grave
As pointless pulpit faced an empty pew.
Why come to churches if they will not save?
He said: A church once sound and orthodox
Stands in the city, decked with dust and weed,
Its windows dark and doors fixed with padlocks
And placard whose authority decreed
That parishes can never TEC depart,
And 'piscopal this church will always stay.
The narrow minds must chose to walk apart,
For those who stay must pay obedience due.
This Church will always make its point to say
To all of reasoned faith “We Welcome You”.
And silence reigned inside as in a grave
As pointless pulpit faced an empty pew.
Why come to churches if they will not save?
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Episcopal sacra-mince
The hotest Episcopal scene
Is a bishop we call Vicky Gene
But when he lays on his hands
To his new confirmands
Does his chrism cantain vaseline?
Is a bishop we call Vicky Gene
But when he lays on his hands
To his new confirmands
Does his chrism cantain vaseline?
Monday, January 7, 2008
Lambeth Follies
Our ABC right now is Rowan
But I can't tell if he's comin' or goin'
His leadership's risible
And intention invisible
But I believe it's a schism he's sowin'
It seemed appropriate to begin this new venture with something silly that yet presumes to also be serious, for what could be sillier than posting thoughts on the ether.
If I have not either gotten a life or a girlfriend, or a good case of beer, I will in a little while post my likely irrelevant argument as to why all the conservative bishops who can should go to Lambeth regardless of what can be realistically achieved.
But I can't tell if he's comin' or goin'
His leadership's risible
And intention invisible
But I believe it's a schism he's sowin'
It seemed appropriate to begin this new venture with something silly that yet presumes to also be serious, for what could be sillier than posting thoughts on the ether.
If I have not either gotten a life or a girlfriend, or a good case of beer, I will in a little while post my likely irrelevant argument as to why all the conservative bishops who can should go to Lambeth regardless of what can be realistically achieved.
Labels:
ABC,
Anglicanism,
limericks or poems
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